The Gift of Divorce


My divorce is drawing to a close. Along with the feelings of expectation and anticipation that this long, drawn out process is soon to end, there is anxiety. The anxiety comes from the backlash coming from the last stages. There are still details to be finalized and my ex is not happy about them.

The great thing is… I see through him now. His words aren’t devastating to me. I hurt for my children, they get caught in the middle, they are collateral damage in this. My decisions have hurt them. His decisions continue to hurt them.I must do to do all I can to reduce their pain and protect them in this process.

A divorce was never where I imagined my marriage would end. I always dreamed of the happily ever after, the give and take, compromise, struggles and triumph of a relationship weathering the years.


Scripture tells us that we were given divorce because of the hardness of our hearts (Mark 10:4-5). It was a gift to protect us when things went wrong. It’s not an “easy way out”, it’s probably one of the hardest things to travel through. It’s not the intended end of marriage, it’s an “escape hatch”.

I’m grateful for the escape hatch. I’m grateful this 7+ year process is finally ending.

I know the last few stages of this journey aren’t going to be easy. My ex won’t let go that simply and he’ll continue to fight the final details as much as he can, but eventually it will end and I will be set free.

We have to see the blessings. They are in front of us, they are intertwined with all things positive and negative, the good and bad. I choose to see through the trials, struggles, to the gifts.


4 thoughts on “The Gift of Divorce

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