Who’s Abused?

Recently, on Facebook, a question was posed about what factors contributed to women needing to leave a marriage and not have resources to be able to do so. Most of the answers showed that the common belief, is that women have a lack of education (i.e. career to fall back on), and they got married…Read more Who’s Abused?

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Is It Normal?

In many abusive relationships, the abuser is a fabulous person. They can be: fun to be with hard workers great parents supportive friends always helpful volunteer or work at church active in the community publicly affectionate verbally supportive quick with jokes eager to always be with their partner Right up until the moment they aren't.…Read more Is It Normal?

Saving Abusive Marriage?

This post is about what I think about saving, or even trying to save an abusive marriage. It's my opinion. My perspective. Make of it what you will. Can an abusive marriage be saved? I've heard it can happen. I think it's possible IF the following happen: The abuse is recognized in the beginning of…Read more Saving Abusive Marriage?

Is Some Abuse Deserved?

The short answer is NO. To be clear, I'm emphatic, non-negotiable, and certain about my opinion on this matter. There is no such thing as "deserved" abuse. Now, there are relationships where the abuse victim finally stands up for themselves and strikes back -- that's called self-defense. And, there are relationships in which there appears…Read more Is Some Abuse Deserved?

Consequences and Accountability

Today's post might be a bit of a rant, but it's what's on my mind, so I hope you bear with me... and I welcome courteous conversation if you want to comment. I talk a lot about the effects of abuse. I've talked about forgiveness, moving on and I've talked a bit about never going…Read more Consequences and Accountability

Blame Mentality

What is the difference between actually being a victim, or someone who is exhibiting a victim mentality? Victim Mentality says "I am a victim of life". A true victim says "I am a victim of a (set of) circumstance(s)". One is "playing victim", the other is actually a victim. We need to be able to…Read more Blame Mentality