Relationships

I've been giving a lot of thought to relationships lately. It's been 11 years since my separation, and almost 3 since the divorce was finalized. There are days, I still wonder if I made the right choice. I did my best to choose a husband who was safe, and I failed. He was not safe,…Read more Relationships

An Anxious Christmas

I've been filled with anxiety lately. There are so many reasons I could be, and even should be, anxious. Finances, children, new diagnosis, Christmas, friendships, family, Christmas, weather .... I don't like having anxiety. It annoys me. As my anxiety rises, I feel like I'm failing at everything: housekeeping, parenting, personal goals, finances, friendships. I…Read more An Anxious Christmas

Who’s Abused?

Recently, on Facebook, a question was posed about what factors contributed to women needing to leave a marriage and not have resources to be able to do so. Most of the answers showed that the common belief, is that women have a lack of education (i.e. career to fall back on), and they got married…Read more Who’s Abused?

Saving Abusive Marriage?

This post is about what I think about saving, or even trying to save an abusive marriage. It's my opinion. My perspective. Make of it what you will. Can an abusive marriage be saved? I've heard it can happen. I think it's possible IF the following happen: The abuse is recognized in the beginning of…Read more Saving Abusive Marriage?

Is Some Abuse Deserved?

The short answer is NO. To be clear, I'm emphatic, non-negotiable, and certain about my opinion on this matter. There is no such thing as "deserved" abuse. Now, there are relationships where the abuse victim finally stands up for themselves and strikes back -- that's called self-defense. And, there are relationships in which there appears…Read more Is Some Abuse Deserved?

Consequences and Accountability

Today's post might be a bit of a rant, but it's what's on my mind, so I hope you bear with me... and I welcome courteous conversation if you want to comment. I talk a lot about the effects of abuse. I've talked about forgiveness, moving on and I've talked a bit about never going…Read more Consequences and Accountability

Don’t Call it Abuse… Unless it Is.

I read this post on Facebook today: My parents were apparently abusive to me when I was a kid. They made me do household jobs, go to school. gave me a curfew and smacked my backside when I did wrong. They put food on the table and we were expected to eat it- They put…Read more Don’t Call it Abuse… Unless it Is.

Importance of Affirmation

I'm seeing a trend on social media where there a number of "quizzes" available to complete, based on your social media profile. You click on the link and it tells you what they think is amazing about you. You can test how "smart" you are, how beautiful, what people like about you, etc. There is a…Read more Importance of Affirmation

I Am A Victim

There is a belief that you are not a victim of domestic violence unless you are killed by it. There is a political correctness emerging that says we must use the term "survivor" instead of victim. This attack against the word "victim" comes from an honest place, it comes from a place of encouraging people…Read more I Am A Victim

Crime of Passion

What do you think when you hear of a "Crime of Passion"? What emotions does it bring to mind? Wikipedia defines it as follows: refers to a violent crime, especially homicide, in which the perpetrator commits the act against someone because of sudden strong impulse such as sudden rage rather than as a premeditated crime. The…Read more Crime of Passion